Here's some mind impasse consciousness charades to meditate on the next time you feel like none of it makes any sense. Namaste. Who gives a shit?Thank God, I am not a proctologist.The longer you talk (/think), the more shit you make up.When shit hits the fan, don't put on the fan.You can make fart sounds … Continue reading Seven shitty zen koans
Who else wants to get a life?
Editing every single thought you have in your head to just the perfect degree, so you can make them look natural, like these are thoughts you have all the time, is content creation's a la mode. Anyway, here are some random thoughts I had this morning. I think I am an introvert. My imaginary friend … Continue reading A day in the head
We have all taken a towering shit on America since Trump. While Americans have been doing most of the turd throwing themselves, the rest of us outside beelined to blow into the troll trumpet. Why pay attention to the cancerous growth of a political clown posse you are in when you can scratch someone else's … Continue reading American chop suey
Writing about how to become viral is like making a career transition from whore to pimp, or as cyberspace calls it: Search Engine Optimization. SEO is a puppy named coronavirus putting a face mask on a sneezing panda named cryptocurrency. With SEO, you can make millions of dollars from home, lose your belly fat and … Continue reading How to XXX your website traffic
Everything sucks. The Wi-Fi.The Weather.The Phone.The Food.The Job.The Joint.The Music.The Mankind.This Alliteration.That Alligator. All right. I feel better. Let's get started. There was a time not long back when we all went apeshit over positive thinking. You know the time when we all pretended not to notice Rimy was sad, and when she started crying, … Continue reading Cry babies
There are two types of people in the world... The one type believes writer's block is real and that there are days when you can't put a single word on the page because you have forgotten how to write and may never write again and you make yourself feel better by imagining how dying alone … Continue reading Writer’s block
I have never been scared of running out of ideas. And that scares me. My ideas all tend to be problems. My writing and my problems share a co-dependency that borders on creative masochism, where the ability to write depends on how flawed I am, and writing becomes a virtue-signaling exercise in feeling better about … Continue reading How to come up with idiotic ideas
Jerks. They have an assole aura about them no one quite understands. Is it their childhood? Are they just having a bad day, for like the six-thousandth day in a row? Or maybe it's something exclusively annoying about your face. Say what you will about them, behaviour science's radical right know how to bring out … Continue reading How to become a jerk
